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How do you get your family to understand that because of the pain I need them to help with chores? Mine seem blind to what I am going through.
9 Comments-
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@eclecticzebra My two sons are in their 30”s. One has Aspergers, both have ADHD. When I was diagnosed, even though had pain for years, I explained it to them. I just can’t through to them.
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@eeyore509 Ahh I feel for you 🙁 Maybe they just don’t comprehend it.? It is difficult to convey an invisible illness to someone in general. Are they high functioning?
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If you go to Pain Management, is there any chance they could go with you? Maybe one at a time, so they hear what you go through in a very real, fact based setting. If they have questions, they may take a doctors statement more seriously than Mom. As mothers we often get overlooked, ‘Mom will always get it done.’ You are their SuperMom, always. Their rock. With years of them thinking, Mom can do it all… and have- maybe they are just, in a way, in denial or think it will pass?
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@eclecticzebra They are both high functioning and hold good jobs. I think you might be right. I have always taken care of everything. But, they are blind to see when something needs cleaning. They inherited that from their Father.
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Maybe give each of them, one plate, one spoon, fork knife etc. Box up everything else. If they dont wash their own dishes-they eat out of their hands..LOL Maybe that would drive a point home?
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I hope you get the compassion and understanding you deserve. Sometimes people don’t comprehend the struggles that others face. I am lucky to have a partner that understands, but it wasn’t until started he going to appointments with me that he started to be more supportive.
I sincerely hope everyone here has someone who is compassionate and supportive. Whether you struggle from daily pain and/or fatigue… it is always nice to have someone in your corner who doesn’t believe it’s all in your head.
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HA. I feel you on this so deeply! I’m divorced because of it largely, to be honest. Anything past making them read The Spoon Theory and seeing your pained efforts, honestly I don’t know. It’s really a respect factor. As for kids, a chore chart and rewards help, depending on their age. They have to learn how to do it all anyway being that we haven’t found the fountain of youth. What is the reason they are giving to not help? In a truly loving relationship, they should WANT to help you. (https://butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/)